


Impossibilities

by ClaraCivry (Kat_Of_Dresden)



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Character Study-ish, Hurt/Comfort, Post canon, almost fluff at the end, happens just after the movie, hux thinks, mostly hux's thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-30
Updated: 2015-12-30
Packaged: 2018-05-10 10:57:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5583226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kat_Of_Dresden/pseuds/ClaraCivry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hux realises, after rescuing him, that Kylo Ren is not just a liability, but also a person.</p><p>This changes things.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Impossibilities

They always asked him for the most impossible things. 

And he was not an impossible man, Hux was simply a military leader. Ressourceful, yes, with a lot of initiative and motivation; a man who got things done and put everything in motion without a single hesitation. Practically a machine, one would say, thanks to his efficiency and coldness. But he was just a man. And they kept testing his limits, asking for more and more difficult things without ever thanking him for his job. Sometimes he wished he could throw a tantrum like Ren, break something. Call some names and get some relief. 

But then he would have to deal with the aftermath and fix the damn thing. Ren never thought of the consequences, but he had to, always and had to leave everything as it was. Hux was in charge of many things, among them the fallout of Kylo Ren's overtly emotional outbursts. In that particular occasion, he had to rescue the man from a quickly exploding and collapsing planet. As if he didn't have more important things to do after they lost their base and their most powerful secret weapon. But orders were orders, and duty came first.

So he had taken one of his best pilots and was now overlooking the broken down surface of the planet, tracking the man's signal, desperately looking for a black robed figure among the white of the snow. This was truly and utterly impossible, and yet he would have to do it, as he did everything. Hux asked the pilot to fly lower, and the man looked at him with a stern look. Yes, he knew that his people were unhappy and he knew that a lot what they was dangerous. But his duty was to retrieve Kylo Ren, and duty came before everything. 

“There.” 

Several metres below them, there was a still figure all black robes and stains of red blood on the accumulating snow. He went down on a ladder and tried to stir him, but to no avail. As usual, he had to do everything himself. Sometimes, Hux imagined himself as the new supreme leader. Only having to appear occasionally, giving all the orders and never being questioned or even looked in a wrong way. Getting respect. But, alas, despite all the work he did.... Better not to overthink it and do what he had to do. He took Ren in his arms and signaled so they both could be lifted up. 

Ren was still unresponsive, and Hux could count at least four bleeding wounds. This was not good news, not at all. Because while he recovered, Ren was going to have time to think, and that was never positive. The man already thought too much as it was – if he just thought a little less and did a bit more, focused simply on doing what he had to instead of what he should and shouldn't do, things would be much more easy. Maybe it was all that force that messed with his head, jumbling everything everything with thoughts, words and feelings. 

But maybe all those feelings and emotions were part of why he was so powerful, and why they needed him so much. 

Looking down at the dark-haired unconscious figure, Hux finally came to the painful realisation that Kylo Ren was a person, much like himself. It should have been obvious, but Hux was used to dehumanizing everyone that worked for him: they were sometimes assets, sometimes pieces that helped the machine that was the first order work, sometimes liabilities. Their mission, their duty was too important for the concerns of regular people – feelings needed to be put aside for the good of the order, and the universe itself, that would crumble and collapse on itself without their leadership. Which made Ren mostly a liability. 

Hux would have hated the man, if he'd allowed himself to lose time with wastes of time such as hating a team mate. He understood his value, but didn't know if he was really worth it, worth all the broken damage, crippled soldiers, all the incessant and distracting drama. Hux only saw the cost of the damages, the broken equipment, the time they lost. The very many inconvenients of having such an unstable operative in such a high position. 

It wasn't easy for Hux to think of people as people, because he didn't enjoy seeing ruthless bloodshed and massacres first hand. He liked the aftermath, but not the process. He felt they were necessary and knew that they needed to win to maintain their life, but didn't enjoy the laser beams and sounds of agonising people. He preferred to watch everything from a distance, hearing the sounds but immune to the smell of decay and death. Seeing the consequences but not feeling them. 

Hux wasn't a great fan of feeling.

But it was difficult to put that distance now, in that small ship, when Ren was sprawled in the cabin so close to him, all long lifeless limbs and bleeding wounds, all erratic breathing and involuntary twitchs.... so terribly, irrevocably human. Maybe he had gone at him all wrong, the general realised in that moment. Maybe ignoring and frowning upon Kylo Ren's outbursts was the most counterproductive thing he could have done, because it probably made him more insecure. And insecurity led to doubts, and doubts led to the light side. Maybe if he (or someone, but who else did hard work besides him, Hux sometimes wondered) had given some value to Ren's excessive.... emotions maybe the other man would have felt better, and been more efficient. 

(And maybe, just maybe, after all he had done for the order, and all the voices he'd battled inside his head, maybe that man, that person deserved some sort of comforting, some sort of support. And maybe, after all this time, if Hux allowed himself to feel in this moment he'd be able to feel some sympathy, some concern for this man who'd been on his side for so long, sacrificing so much. Just maybe.)

Kylo Ren was taken away to be healed, and Hux asked to be informed with any change, no matter how minor. The medical personnel seemed surprised and confused, but they assured that they would do it. 

When Kylo finally woke up, Hux was there, sitting next to him, watching. Why was he there? Surely he could have sent someone else to inform him if Snoke had summoned them, right? And did it mean that he'd been there while he slept, too? Kylo's dark eyes found Hux's pale ones and there was a gesture of recognition, almost relief.

“I will inform the medics that you woke.” 

The general stood up, and, almost as an after thought, he said:

“I trust you are feeling better?” 

Kylo couldn't believe his ears, was General Hux showing concern? No, that couldn't be. Hux caring was completely out of the question, impossible. 

But then again, they always Hux to do impossible things. And he always delivered. 

“I am, yes.”

And Hux didn't smile, but he tried to. 

Another impossibility, right there.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked! All feedback more than welcome :)
> 
> Could do a second part from Kylo's point of view, if anyone's interested.


End file.
